Well, there you are...Wilderness. Seriously, what took you so long? I knew you would find me somehow, some way because my life had been going so well. And, you did... I was almost willing to retract being thankful for you on Thursday. You challenged my resolve to be content. When my grandpa died late Saturday evening, you swept into my family and turned it upside down. However, you didn't get me. I now know God is trying to draw me closer to Himself. You will not knock me off track. I've been given strength from the Lord God Almighty. You will not turn me toward Egypt. Got it?!? God has freed me from bondage, just as He freed the Israelites. I'm not looking back.
Alrighty then! Now that I've gotten that out of the way, I am turning my attention toward more important things--my Resolution for the week. All week I've been reading about submission and embracing the God given role I was created for.
Since Kyle has taken such a strong spiritual leadership role in our home, he has excelled at leading our family. We don't even have to talk about if we are going to church now, we all assume. I have to brag on him because he deserves it. He poured out every drop of alcohol in our home. He told me that it (the alcohol) was just sitting there waiting for him to drink it. So, he got rid of it. He also quit smoking! We've cleaned up our DVR record list. We are listening to ALL praise music. Life is still good despite the death of my grandpa. My proudest moment has been seeing him excited about the word of God. He's completing the Resolution for Men. He has embraced his ordained role in our family, and may I say he is doing quite well? (Of course I can! This is my blog! I can say anything
I want, right? In that case, Kyle's doing better than great! He's been an amazing husband and father!)
I'm...struggling. This new role I have been exploring all week talks of God expecting me to yield to my husband. It's a new concept, and God with his good humor has given me numerous opportunities to practice this week. I'm adjusting, I'll say that. There are some instances where I prefer to be the follower, but in my home isn't one of them. One area where I desire your prayers is yielding to what Kyle thinks is best for our kids. Sometimes, our opinions differ from the other. That's when our conversations begin looking like this:
Kyle: You aren't going to let me be the leader, are you?
Me: [To be read with lots of defensiveness] Just because you are the spiritual leader, doesn't make you the parental leader. On parenting, we are equal partners.
Kyle/Me: [lots of silence]
You know what I just discovered? He is the leader in every aspect of our family. I am to yield to him whether I agree or not. It doesn't mean I am a doormat for him to walk on. He is the leader. Not me.
Ugh. That's hard to swallow. I have to go tell him I was wrong. He needs to be patient with me. I'm learning to relinquish my authority to him. It isn't easy, but it is how God intended me to be whether I agree or disagree. It is what it is. I must do it.
So, by signing my name
I will champion God's model for womanhood in the face of
a post-feminist culture. I will teach it to my daughters
and will encourage it's support by my sons.
P.S. I'm expecting you all to hold me accountable to this one.