Wednesday, November 9, 2011

RFW: Happy to Be You

Resolution for Women:  Happy to be You


Let me just say, I *heart* this chapter.  One of the most important things I read was this:


“You are the only you the world has.  The only one we really need.  The one who, according to Psalm 139 has been…

  • Examined by God                 
  • Known by Him
  • Seen by Him
  • Protected by Him
  • Followed by Him
  • Blessed by Him
  • Guided by Him
  • Strengthened by Him
  • Supported by Him
  • Carefully created by Him
  • Led by Him


Have you ever really tried getting acquainted with this person who was important enough to God Himself to put this much time and attention into creating and supporting?”  (page 61)


Record uniquenesses other people see in you.  Which of these surprise you?


This was one of the most uncomfortable tasks I’ve completed so far.  I began by asking Kyle what he thought was unique about me, and he told me I liked to sleep.  Seriously?!?  Then he followed it up by saying, “Well you’re also OCD.  When you start looking for something, you won’t stop until you find it.”  “Okay,” I told him.  “You are just making fun of me now.”  HA!


So, I sent out an email to my closest friends at work and told them I was fishing for compliments!  =)  Then I explained to them the purpose of why I was asking each friend to tell me what was so unique about me, so I wouldn’t feel so bad!  Here are some of the responses I’ve received.  Please note their words are in black, my thoughts are in DUKE BLUE =)


Paula said:  “What admires me the most about you is how you juggle everything you do like school, work, raising 2 little boys.  I really never hear you complain about it that much, (you haven’t seen my complaining list!!!) usually just work.  But now you can be content in your work.  It was hard for me to raise just one child and work.


April said:  “You are very sensitive to others needs and feelings and are always looking to help someone else.  Not everyone is fortunate to have those traits!!!  And another thing, OCD does not have to be negative trait!!  IT means that once you make your mind up about how something needs to be you are not going to QUIT until things are the way they should be in your mind.  Determination (that is how I define OCD!!) is a strong trait and one you should be proud of.”  (To be fair, once Kyle stopped making fun of me, he did included determined in his list.)


Carrie said:  You are a very determined person, which I know Kyle said.  But you follow through with what you believe in and make it happen, whether it is with school, faith, or just things in general.  You are a very unique friend to me because no matter what I know I can talk to you about anything and you will tell me your HONEST opinion whether I necessary like it or not.”  (Please not I’d just given my friend Carrie non-solicited relationship advice.)


Finally, Donna said:  “You are funny!! (Most surprising to me.)  You are passionate about what is important to you—family, friends, education, work;  meaning you give those things your all, 110%.  You are a wonderful writer; caring, honest and inspiring.  You are compassionate, thoughtful and giving.  You try to do what is right and expect others to as well.  (I also expect others to do things exactly like me)  I don’t mean this negatively but you are hard on yourself when you don’t feel you have excelled.  (I took notice to this statement)  And you’ve got great teeth!” (This made me actually laugh out loud.)


Record how you can be more intentional about using and celebrating these characteristics.


I think something that Donna said really stood out to me.  I am extremely hard on myself and often set up unrealistic goals.  I’m working on it, but when I beat up on myself often enough, it’s only impacted more by the actual beating up I allow others to do on me.  I can intentionally be mindful of being caring, compassionate, and thoughtful.  I do believe God created me to be all of those things.  To showcase my determination, I have to stop taking on too many obligations.  Sometimes my determination is cancelled out by my frustration and complaining.  I portray an image that doesn’t invite other people to explore the same opportunities I am exploring, namely returning to school while balancing work and family.


How would the dynamics of your family, your office, or your relationships benefit from your doing this?


I think I would be happier—or more content.  I believe that by recognizing my own self worth, I could encourage others to embrace their own uniquenesses.  There is only one me.  There is only one you.  And that’s all the world needs. 


As a side note, it really made me feel good about myself to have others tell me what was unique about me.  I would like to remember in the future that we all (men and women included) need to be edified and complimented by each other.  


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I began blogging several years ago in search of new friends who, like me, were having a difficult time getting pregnant. Five years, 2 miscarriages, 4 failed IUI's, and a doctor who told us "It will never happen" later, we are the proud parents of Kade and Kohen. They are each an example of God's absolute perfection. We thank God where medical intervention stops, Divine intervention begins.